Thursday, January 13, 2011

Things I Learned in 2010 (Some For the Very First Time!)

I learned the following lessons in 2010, though some of them are better categorized as things I re-learned:

**Ricky Martin is gay. Okay, I'll admit, when I first "learned" this in the holy bible of all things pop culture (i.e. People magazine) I thought to myself, "Hey, didn't I learn this in, like, 1996?" But, after reading the insightful article, I realized that I could only have suspected this in 1996, since ol' Ricky is just coming out now. So, technically, I learned something I already knew! Maybe I'm smart! Or, maybe, I'm just not stupid! (These things do not mean the same thing. They don't.)
For 2011, I hope to "learn" the same thing about Ryan Seacrest. I know he went to Paris with his, um, "girlfriend" Julianne Hough, but come on. They went with his mom and sister and they all went shoe shopping. In Paris. Wow. That is pretty much the straightest, non-gay thing I know I've ever heard. Right?

**There are really not as many murders as the true-crime lineup on TV would have you believe. I should have learned this before because I've been watching these lineups for years, but I have put it together now: they are pretty much the same murders, given different treatments on various programs. The same wife shooting her husband can be told in different ways on Snapped, Notorious, Dateline ID, 48 Hours Mystery - you get the picture. And then, if you are really special, you might get your own "inspired by real events" episode on one of the flavors of Law and Order. It's reassuring to know, really, when you consider how many less murders are being sensationalized on television.

**People in general, whether famous, infamous, or otherwise, are not so much interested in "the truth" as they are interested in saying they are "interested in the truth." Get it? This is why I basically don't believe anyone about anything, unless I find uncontroverted, neutral evidence to support it. This might sound cynical - and I know Conan told us all to not be cynical - but I believe this works for me and my defense mechanisms. Plus, I might just have been born this way. Like Ricky. And Ryan.

**It really all is about perspective. Like, a year and a half ago I really wanted to lose about 10 pounds. And now, I would almost give up a non-vital limb to be back at that weight I was about a year and a half ago. So, this has taught me a valuable lesson in my old(er) age: be happy about where you are, since you seriously do not know how good you have it when you have it good. You don't know when it might get better or worse, so you had better laugh it up and enjoy. Everyday. Take all the opportunities to make your life the fullest it can be. No matter what.

Do you hear me Ryan?

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Steph's days are complete with little Franco/Mr. Buddy Pants, Pittsburgh Steelers football, Penguins hockey, all things WVU, cold beverages, new handbags, shoe-shopping, pups, and lots and lots of movies. And, of course, her glorious, nutty family.